Thursday, 3 December 2009

Eldest.

Amidst the busy hours
of running around chasing my tail endless forking out meeting needs hugs and kisses bumped knees shouting laughing toast and jam fireside stories bedtime waking up time bath time homework dinner washing clothes cakes birthdays coffee driving nagging hugging walking breathing dreaming loving loving loving...

Little ones are good at getting their needs met.

Some nights I would go to bed,
and wonder,

Did I have any one to one conversation with him today?


But now we have an hour
in the pre~dawn quiet before the house awakes,
before he leaves for school.

And I am amazed.

Who is this young man?

This young man.

35 comments:

One Womans Thoughts said...

I enjoyed the way that you captured the essence of chaotic and overwhelming everyday parenting. How we always feel that we wanted to do more, give more, and be more. The photo was a touching addition. A beautiful post Ciara, thank you.

Katharina

jaboopee said...

Its pretty busy round at yours , with a big emphasis on the pretty though . really lovely photo [big ;0)]
and i can so relate to the sentiment .

lizzybits said...

that's just how i feel with my 13 year old, ted. it's such special moments that i get with him one on one....and i'm always so happy when i realze he's really is very kind and loving guy.....
again, your writing is beautiful....thank you.

Tracey said...

Thank you. I shall go give my eldest a little extra attention right now.

2busy said...

They grow so fast! Cherish these moments...

Ellen said...

I have a 13 year old...and treasure the moments when he throws his arm around my shoulders or lays his head on my lap while we watch TV...he is taller than I am now...so strange to see how fast he grew! I miss the young years which flew by way to quickly. Yet...I do look forward to watching him become a man...
I am enjoying your blog so very much...thank you!

Kym Bowles said...

A beautiful post Ciara, and I know EXACTLY where you are 'coming from'! as regards teenagers and (lack of) everyday conversation!!

Erin said...

Oh, this nearly made me cry... knowing how quickly my boys are growing up as well. Reminds me of how I need to store up all those hugs and kisses and not take them for granted. :)

Such a warm &welcoming hallway!

marie said...

sounds a little like my family. the way I feel about my relationship with my brother, I guess. (except we don't have the magical time before school.) I am so glad you are getting to spend time with him.

Jenny said...

What a wonderful post, Ciara. It's important to make a connection despite how busy life can be for us.

Pamela Terry and Edward said...

Life happens so fast.

Cyndi said...

I have to thank you so very much for that post. I have just calmed myself down from what seems like daily arguments with my son. You made me step back and realize maybe its time for me to talk more to this young man and complain less, thank you.

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Moira said...

That's lovely, thank you for taking the time to share it.

Annah said...

Oh Ciara, as always, your emotional posts have the potential to make me cry.
I can have days where I am ravaged with guilt that I am busy and running and not seeing my boys in the moment. This week I have been busy working, trying to get stock ready for some Christmas fairs, and get through orders. Cal, 10, asked me to sit down with them while they were eating their dinner, and I was so torn as I needed to get the kitchen cleaned and dinner ready for Michael and I before I headed upstairs to work for the night. And what will Cal remember. That I didn't sit for more than 2 minutes.....
Glad you are finding time for Ru....

Paddy said...

Reflective....nice.

marta said...

oh!! he got his piano! amazing young man x

Karlette said...

:o) I just love your blog its so home and warm and lovely.

Martin H. said...

Very nice post. You're there for the young man and an hour in the 'pre~dawn quiet before the house awakes' is real quality time.

ladybug-zen said...

so beautiful, Ciara. so very beautiful.

Frau said...

Thanks for the reminder! Have a wonderful weekend!

Jessie said...

Those precious moments are so important and he'll remember it forever. My eyes filled up with tears reading this. I have 3 sons, 2 have left home with one still here and savour the time he's still living with us, it's too quick, too quick.xx

acornmoon said...

You are such a lovely mum, I am sure you will always find time.

Jenea said...

Very funny blog!!! :)

Tia said...

my Ryan would have been 13 too... be yourself Ciara they`ll always remember you didnt try to pretend you were something/someone you were`nt... xx

affectioknit said...

Oh - I know what you mean - they grow up so fast...

Jo said...

Aw. Sweet. Quality not quantity. Any more and he'd probably tire of having to talk to his tiresome mum. Muuuuuu-uuum, go-od!!

:)

And thanks to Finn for helping me find my runaway lost boy in school on Friday :)

Rebecca S. said...

My boys are 15 and 16. At one point last year I started crying when I realized how far they had come from being those rowdy little creative beings they once were. Now they are both taller than I and much more serious (though still creative), and I try to make sure we connect in a real way at least once a day. It is truly worth the effort as these connections have become a habit for them, too.

inkmama said...

Lovely.

Laura Hegfield said...

I have girls, they tend to share...maybe too much sometimes...nah, never too much. How is it that time flies and stands still all at once? This is the mystery of being a mother to me. My youngest will be 13 on Thursday and my eldest 16 in a few weeks.

enjoy each stage, each moment as much as motherly possible.
Laura

R0cKi said...

I really enjoy how you captured everything as a parent that you have to endure. My parents feel how you do because they have 6 children, 4 of which are teens, one is 19 with a newborn daughter, and the youngest is a wanna-be-teenageer-9 year old girl. They try their best to get it in with each of us as often as possible, but with all of the chaos it's just not enough time in the day. The picture is a lovely touch because it shows how he is independent during his free time whenever you aren't there for conversation. It adds to the feeling of longing and parental stress.

Kato said...

This one touched my heart :)

Emma said...

Beautiful post, Ciara. I vividly remember the day you told me you were pregnant with him, on the way home from Belfast where you, Mum and Dad had picked me up at the airport. It has been an honor to watch him grow, nurtured by his loving parents. Always an affectionate and creative child...now young man!

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mimi charmante said...

I somehow missed this before, and reading it nearly brought me to tears. As you and I are in such similar places, I feel exactly what you do - the eldest asks the least, thus, sometimes I give him the least. Thank you for the reminder - as some days, that time in the morning before everyone else wakes is our only one on one time~
xx