Sunday, 19 January 2014

In The Midst Of The Grey Season, A Quiet Goodbye.

There is a slow sinking that happens when the year turns new, isn't there?
The soft, muted landing after the bright sparkle and lustre of the festive season, the aftermath of the whirlwind of gatherings which we found ourselves at finds us in a tangle on the sofa, amidst groans of don't-want-to's and do-I-have-to's and general resistance to the routine of everyday that must be seen to now, whether we want to or not.
Personally, apart from very little get up and go, I don't mind this time of year. I find it a time of reflection and expectation, equally looking back, and forward, at the same time. A time when getting out and walking seems to be a good way of allowing thoughts and ideas to simmer and process and bloom into something with potential, but also a time when that sofa and fire are just far too comfortable, and the days too short, to inspire anything other than hanging out together and staying warm.
So, a time of opposites, but all very quiet and slow and not at all taxing.

This morning the house smells of cinnamon buns. There is frost on the grass, a slick of ice on the car windows, and as I sit in the warmth, looking out at the pink sky above Bray Head, I find myself coming back once more to that timely idea of resolutions for the new year, of what intentions I would like to set for the coming year, and something that has been floating around and coming in to land every so often, for over a year now, has finally come home to roost.

I have decided to take a (permanent) hiatus here.
After six years blogging in this place I call Milkmoon, things in my life have changed so much that I am finding it increasingly difficult to make things fit in here, and to find the means and inspiration to. I have tried to force Milkmoon to evolve with these changes, but the result has left me more and more dissatisfied and uninspired, and now, nine months after leaving the house where this all began, I realise once more, that it is the idea of change that is more scary than the change itself, and it's time to let this go.

I love blogging, and I am not giving it up, but I am letting go of Milkmoon, and I do hope some of you loyal, lovely people who visit here, find something of interest in my new project(s?) when it is up and running properly.
I have met some extraordinarily wonderful, inspiring people through Milkmoon, people who I am honoured to call friends now, and I do hope we stay in touch.

I may pop in here occasionally. I may even open up again, and dust things off, some day in the future. Who knows. But for now, much like leaving our little cottage, I am shutting up shop, leaving behind the ghosts of my small children as they were when this all began, for they too are growing and changing, and to me, more than anything else, the Milkmoon years were all about our life as a family with young children, in our little house by the sea, and one of the things I have found difficult to adjust to, is not really having small children to photograph any more! I got such pleasure out of this, of being around little ones, being inspired by their innocence and the view of the world from their perspective, and a part of me misses it very much. I am in love with seeing what wondrous people they are growing into, loving how this is influencing my interests in other directions, yes, even loving the challenges it brings! At the same time, now that they are older, other parts of my life are being given a chance to develop, and it's very exciting, but feels wrong to introduce it here in this golden, storybook place of magic, of small children and the waving grass, of being Mama and nothing else. That is something I want to preserve here, and so, a new place for new beginnings feels right to me.

I will call in and update with a link to the new place as soon as possible, though I am not sure when that will be. There are a number of different paths opening up right now and I'm not sure where they will lead.

So thank you all, for sharing these years with me, I hope we meet again.

Lots of love from the Garden of Ireland,

Ciara xxx

Update : You can find me over here.


Gigi Thibodeau said...

Oh, Ciara, I am glad and grateful that I found your blog four years ago, and that we have stayed connected ever since through our blogs, our photographs, recipes, and random thoughts across the miles. You never cease to inspire others with your words and with your thoughtful way of being in the world. I will miss Milkmoon, but I know I won't have to miss you, and this fact makes me very happy, my friend.

I have been having similar feelings about my own blog. So many other creative projects are cooking, so much else is going on that the blog doesn't quite fit anymore. And yet I LOVE blogging, so it might just be that I will start another one soon. It's good to read your words here. I think I've been looking for permission to move on. That sounds a bit crazy as I write it, but it's true!

Thank you for all the beauty you bring to each and every day. xoxo Gigi

Mimi said...

Ciara, very best wishes on your new project, wherever it brings you. It is hard to let go of the familiar, and I'm sad to see the Milkmoon days close, but life does take us on exciting journeys, and things cannot stay the same, so we must evolve.
Delighted to read, though, that you will put a link to the new site, whenever it's up and running.
I think that's the beauty of technology now, that we can make a new home for a new phase!

Anne said...

Hi Ciara,

Sorry to see you go. I've been following your blog for a few years now. I would pop in to have reminders of when I lived in Ireland many years ago. Another blogger when she finished up blogging made a book for her children as memories of their childhood on her blog.

I'll keep popping in to see if you put up a link to your new blog.

Best wishes from Australia XXX

gz said...

I will be sad to lose your wonderful words and images.
Andrea of "Boxes and Bellows" has just posted about continuing blogging. However things and people move on, staying exactly the same just for everyone out there and not considering onesself is not healthy. Looking forward to seeing the post about your new project
Blessings Be
xx gz

CJ Kennedy said...

Thank you for sharing your beautiful pictures and stories. Hope to see you in the Ether again.

Hermann8er said...

Lots of aloha to you and yours from the sunny coast of San Diego, CA. Thank you for your words and pictures...I've enjoyed them all!

Kerry O'Gorman said...

Well Ciara, I know all too well the things of which you speak of...Unfortuneatly the children in my life have somewhat disappeared as well. My sisters girls live on the mainland and it is a long and costly trip to do very often so I have to make do with their visits in the summer. As they grow older though this becomes less interesting to them with their own adventures taking place. I also feel since my sister died, I lost a little bit of joyeux d'vie.
The five children of my brothers, I haven't seen in over a year. He has chosen to estrange himself, along with those children, a precious part of my life and we nor my parents are permitted to see them. It is a very complicated story of which we cannot get to the root of since he will not correspond with us in any way. Although they live in our small, rural town, I never see them.
These kids were incredible 'blog fodder' and I so miss taking them on adventures and journaling about those trips.
Anyway, sorry to go on but yes I know that my blog has lessened in its pull for me as well.
I still take photos and do the odd post but not as much as I used to. It's the artists way to always evolve and find new outlets to create.
I will look forward to any stories you may have in the future from your beautiful Island....maybe someday when I come back we will have a cup of tea together.
All the and light to you.

Mairéad said...

Milkmoon was a wondrous place, full of the magic of the early years of motherhood.
I enjoyed visiting and being reminded of those toddler days. But there are new riches to be found as our children grow older, as you are already seeing. New interests and passions for them, more time for you to indulge in old interests and passions, and discovering new ones.
I look forward to catching up with somewhere else in cyberspace.

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Mairéad said...
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Terra said...

Well goodness, today I discover your blog and today you are stopping blogging here. Best wishes in your future endeavors.

Andrew Judge said...

Sorry to hear you're finishing up this particular project. It was a lovely journey.

ramona said...

A lovely send off. You have done a good service by honoring Milkmoon and your readers by your carefully crafted words. I understand completely your wish to preserve this place as it is which you have so beautifully done with the parting shot of a mother and her children. Thank you for inspiring so many of us to live our dreams.

Stephanie V said...

I have so enjoyed your photos and gentle poetry of life with the little ones. Best wishes for the future projects - I'll be watching for that link.

Sara said...

Ciara, I feel like you and I are are similar paths... though so far away. I'm not sure what my blog is anymore, but it certainly isn't what it once was. And that's okay.

Milkmoon has brought me so much joy, and for that I am thankful. I hope I can still find you around. On Pinterest perhaps. :) All the best to you.

Rebecca S. said...

Letting go of something that feels like it needs to be tied off, not unlike a crochet project that is beautiful in its completion, is hard but also good!
Yes, our lives change dramatically when our little ones, and so ourselves, evolve. Best of luck with the new projects. I have enjoyed Milkmoon so much over the years.

Christin Lore Weber said...

My visits to Milkmoon have been sporatic, but I always came away inspired by your words and photos. You have such a powerful gift communicated through artful and heartfelt quiet. Thank you so very much. I'm looking forward to your next blog.

Half-heard in the Stillness said...

I hope your new venture is exciting and wonderful although we will miss your lovely writing, your wonderful descriptions and evocative photographs. I shall visit here from time to time just to remind myself....

Safe passage my friend,

Hugs Jane

Mel said...

Ciara, What a lovely goodbye… endings and beginnings both can be beautiful. I have every confidence that as you go forth you bring the same creative reflective spirit to all that you do. We here have just been fortunate enough to be allowed a long lingering pause at this intersection which you beautifully shared and illuminated with and of your life. I know the need to evolve, move forward, and yet the tug from behind. The Moon will not go anywhere in the mean-time… and your Milkmoon blog is a treasured work that lives even if you aren't tending to it! I'm so glad to have have found you toward the beginning, and hope that we may intersect, that our paths meaningfully cross, again, in the new and upcoming incarnations of our lives! You definitely will be there in my heart, just as you are now. xo xo ~m

Acornmoon said...

How did I ever miss this post. I do hope you will continue with your writing because you do have a gift.
I feel as if a neighbour has moved house- I wish you well. Take care my friend. x

Anonymous said...

Well done's been a long time coming from what I can see. I'm sure you'll resurrect again in an even greater form!! Does this mean there's a retirement home for aging bloggers out there somewhere??